These Scars Doesnt Show

Im trying to write this all down, to get it off my mind, the pain i feel inside is unbearable.. We fight and fight and fight till i dont even know if its worth fighting any much longer. Insecurity issues, overwhelming sense of jealousy within, over controlling, unfairness, contradicting piles of arguements...i no longer understand whats happening to us.. Maybe it is meant to be, maybe it is not..

For a single moment in my life, i want to feel like my heart isnt about to explode, i would want to tell you please not to go.. Not all scars shows, not all wounds heal. I hope you can see the pain i feel inside because only you can set me free from this misery.. It hurts to see your doing completely okay without me or maybe i did really mean nothing to you after all..

The worst feeling isnt feeling lonely but but being forgotten by someone you cant forget.. If possessiveness is the outcome of true love then anger and jealousy is the outcome of true care. But you have never realize it.. I always thought this pain is temporary and our love is forever, but you have made it the other way round.. I just cant erase you off my life, you have become something permanent in my life.. It is heartbreaking that you are completely aware you have hurt me but still dont care..

Everybody says love hurts. But its completely untrue. Loneliness hurts, rejection hurts, betrayal hurts, lying hurts and most of all losing you hurts like HELL !! Im not a perfect person, i have made a lot of mistakes, some are made intentionally and some are made not intentionally.. But i have still loved you with all my heart and i cant imagine the day that i'll stop loving you. I feel like this pan is gonna last forever and this hurt might most probably never go away.. I dont know what to do but cry...

The pain of holding on is much greater then the pain of letting go.. and this i might experience till the end of us...I have come to a point where i have loved you too much, that even it hurts to stay but i will keep holding on till you have let me go completely..

If only i knew all this then, i would have never fallen for you..

scars from a wounded heart,
Jessica